I never realized how fast time goes until having Solomon. Since my last post, he crossed the line from infant to toddler. I understand now why baby does not fall into a specific age category. I also understand why women will say to their grown children, "you will always be my baby". You never hear them say, "you will always be my infant". A baby is considered newborn for 30 days (some say more, some say less, whatever...you get the point). Then they are considered an infant until they turn one. Then BAM...toddler. Solomon turned one on October 1st, 2013.
I completely understand why the label changes from infant to toddler so dramatically after the first birthday. In some ways, it becomes significantly easier, and in some ways it becomes significantly more exhausting. When Solomon was an infant I spent countless hours washing bottles, bottle parts, breast pump accessories, etc. Literally, every other day, I would spend about a hour washing all these necessary infant components. I stopped breastfeeding when Solomon was around eight months old. He pretty much stopped the bottle right at one. He never got a bottle when going to sleep or anything like that, so it was easy. As we transitioned him from formula to milk, we just gave him milk in sippy cups.
Also right around one, Solomon started walking. This meant not having to carry him constantly from point a to point b. Sure he could crawl, but there are many places where you don't want those little hands to go. Sometime between then and now, he has even started walking from our car into the house. This frees up a lot of hands to carry things in from the car.
Something else in the last seven months that has made being a mother a little easier, is Solomon's ability to communicate. Every day he is learning new words. It is amazing to watch him grow, and watch how he takes in the world around him. He listens when you tell him to do something, and most of the time he is able to tell you what he wants.
Solomon didn't fully sleep through the night until around one either. Now we lay him down, most of the time still awake, he falls asleep on his own and sleeps through the night.
My "toddler" with his own yogurt cup for the first time.
What's the point of all this? It's that often I question whether my baby is still considered a baby. Sure, he will always be my baby, but he already doesn't need me as much as I need him to need me. I guess that will never go away. I try to remember the times I struggled with so much when he was an infant. I try to remember how frustrating breastfeeding was. I try to remember how hard it was to rock him for four hours straight every night for about six weeks, while he went through his fussy spell. Truth is, I don't remember it very well at all. I often was still and took the time to appreciate that period was going to pass much faster than I wanted. That while it was hard, it would be a short amount of time in the span of my life. Truth is, I miss it so much I tear up just writing this. I remind myself of this daily with the frustrations that come along with having a toddler. This too will pass far faster than I will ever anticipate.
I am making a significant change in my life today. I am deleting my social media accounts...for good. I left facebook for a few months around the end of 2013. It was refreshing to not have the constant feeling I needed to check it. Then I quickly found myself taken over by another source for distraction, instagram. I found this whole world of instagram shops, and even started sewing leggings to sell in a shop I created myself. This took every bit of attention that having facebook took. So I logged back into my facebook and have been engulfed ever since. I do not want my son to remember me as a mommy who was constantly staring at my phone or other electronic device. I find myself wanting to take pictures of Solomon, not just to have as sweet memories, but so I can show the people I'm connected with on these accounts. I don't want it to be like that. I have an amazing life, and I want to appreciate it for what it is. Not for what I can make it look like to other people. Millions and billions of people went through their whole lives without social media, I can too. I don't want anything to take away from sweet moments I may miss like these...
Because motherhood.
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